Live Wire

A satirical spin on Trinidad and Tobago news stories

NFM torn by run of the mill thinking

NFM shareholders are allegedly demanding the removal of chairperson Jacqueline Burgess over her refusal to raise the price of flour. Shareholder Anthony Arundel was quoted in the Trinidad Express as criticizing the NFM board for not being “business-like” since it didn’t “seem very willing” to raise the price of flour …

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Gifted Keshorn can do with one more present

Keshorn Walcott is arguably the most gifted athlete in the history of Trinidad and Tobago’s sport after his gold medal javelin throw at the London 2012 Olympics was rewarded with $1 million in cash, an estimated $2.5 million house in Federation Park, 20,000 acres of land in Toco’s vicinity and …

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T&T moves up as a holiday destination

Trinidad and Tobago’s latest Keshorn Walcott-inspired national holiday now places the tiny twin island republic among the top ten countries in the world for letting its workers skip work. Or, with the right application of spin, Trinidad and Tobago can now boast of being in the world’s top ten holiday …

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Ignorance is bliss at National Security press conference

National Security Minister Jack Warner thought that he and HDC managing director Jerlean John paid the sizable and unmentionable fee to bring former NBA star Shaquille O’Neal to Trinidad. Housing Minister Roodal Moonilal apparently knew Warner’s program better than he did and suggested O’Neal’s visit was actually funded by anonymous …

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Tim declares war on cybercriminals; the ones he doesn’t know

Education Minister Tim Goopeesingh declared yesterday’s leak of SEA results to be tantamount to a cybercrime and promised to put National Security Minister Jack Warner on the trail. Wired868 cannot confirm that Warner is already preparing the army and police service for a surprise raid on the alleged rogue employee …

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COP urges Anil to come out of the closet

Sport Minister and MP Anil Roberts is believed to be living a double life that has been the subject of whispers throughout the political fraternity. Yesterday, COP acting chairman Vernon De Lima broke the awkward silence and urged Roberts to come out of the closet. However, Wired868 understands that Roberts …

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Jack’s Shaq-attack inspires youth; broken hearts to follow

National Security Minister Jack Warner, with typical pizzazz, yesterday unveiled his first crime fighting plan with a little help from seven foot one ex-NBA star Shaquille O’Neal. O’Neal and PM Kamla Persad-Bissessar launched the “Hoops of Life” competition in the Beetham Gardens, which will pay out $1.75 million in prize …

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Warner makes flying start; Kublalsingh grounded

National Security Minister Jack Warner was true to his word in making an early and emphatic start to his new portfolio. On the weekend, Warner flippantly declared his desire to reintroduce his interpretation of the “Flying Squad”—a group that is as synonymous with murder and drug dealing as it is …

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Kamla: It is alleged

Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar brushed aside queries as to the suitability of new National Security Minister Jack Warner. Everything from a prima facie case at FIFA level to eyewitness and video accounts in Trinidad and Tobago were mere allegations or else “somebody would be in jail.” The PM sidestepped the …

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PM’s Ministry of Mystery and Obfuscation

Four days after the announcement of a Ministry of National Diversity and Social Integration, Trinidad and Tobago remains confused about the deliverables of the new State body. Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar did not help much when asked for details. The PM offered that Ministers Clifton De Coteau and Embau Moheni …

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Prakash drops pokerface after PM’s reshuffle

COP Political Leader Prakash Ramadhar has welcomed the new Ministry of National Diversity & Social Integration since, he explained, “we need to know more about each other.” And what better way to love each other than through a Ministry of Social Integration? After all, Trinidad and Tobago has been a …

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PM shuffles her Cabinet; Jacks are wild

Minister of National Security: Jack Warner, M.P Minister in the Ministry of National Security: Collin Partap, M.P Minister of Legal Affairs: Prakash Ramadhar, M.P Attorney General: Senator Anand Ramlogan Minister of the People and Social Development: Dr. Glenn Ramadharsingh, M.P Minister in the Ministry of the People and Social Development: …

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