Scene: Office of Caribbean Football Union President, Gordon Derrick. The telephone rings. “Good morning, Bonjour, Buenos Dias, Goedemorgan, Guten morgen, Chow Baby, Gordon Derrick speaking.” Photo: Recently elected CFU president Gordon Derrick “Uhm, Good morning, Mr Derrick. Sepp Blatter here.” “Ah, your Lordship. How are you, sir?” “I’m very well, …

It is Monday morning in the Office of The Minister of Sport. The telephone rings. Sport Minister: “Good morning. The Minister of Spalk speaking.” Anthony Harford: “Ah, Minister, it’s Tony here.” Minister: “Tony, Tony, I’m so glad you called. I wanted to speak to you about your football funding.” Harford: …