Tag Archives: crime plan

This Friday on the Trinidad Guardian’s front page, PSC Chairman Professor Ramesh Deosaran was quoted as saying the crime plans have failed. I didn’t even know we had a crime plan presented to us, far less multiple ones. What I do know is that since being appointed Minister of National Security, …

National Security Minister Jack Warner said he was too busy to discuss the Caribbean’s crime problem in a meeting of regional representatives in Haiti, earlier this week. Well, that’s one way to avoid an awkward trip. Warner is unlikely to be popular in Port-au-Prince since the controversy regarding FIFA and …

National Security Minister Jack Warner told the local media that he has invited former New York Police Chief Bill Bratton, known as “Mr Zero Tolerance”, to lecture Trinidad and Tobago lawmen. Mr Live Wire was unreliably informed that reporters broke into hysterical laughter at the notion that someone referred to …

Scene: Office of the Minister of National Security Phone rings. Jack Warner: “Good morning, President of Trinidad and Tobago speaking.” Fuad Khan: “Erm, sorry, I meant to call Minister Warner.” Warner: “Oh, yes, sorry. Warner speaking.” Khan: “Jack, it’s Fuad. Did you say you were the President?” Warner: “No, no. …

Local Government Minister Suruj Rambachan toured Beetham Gardens yesterday with the acting Police Commissioner and Defence Force Chief and promised 100 URP jobs. Presumably, Beetham residents are less squeamish about $69 than East Port of Spain. Beggars, as people of means keep telling themselves, cannot afford to be saints. Rambachan …

East Port of Spain residents were hopping mad yesterday and took to the streets to protest about getting a six for a nine from National Security Minister Jack Warner. Literally. Last week, Warner said that his “People and Projects for Progress” would create jobs, end poverty and reduce crime in …

Scene: Ministry of National Security Minister Jack Warner: “It is apparent, of course, that Rowley and his mob are responsible for the high murder rate in this country. I propose that we formulate a plan that will curb their activities and allow the people of Laventille to live in peace” …

Scene: An unknown place of great beauty Jack Warner (looking around, bewildered): “Who are you?” Deity: “I am known by many names, but you would know me as God.” Jack: “God? But you don’t look anything like Morgan Freeman!” God: “Sigh. Ever since “Bruce Almighty” everyone seems disappointed when they …

Laventille was left in awe of the “Action Man” this weekend as, within hours of promising a National Security branch in Beverly Hills, excavators were already clearing the land. “I must say that it is very good and he showing that for a minister, he care about the people and …

National Security Minister Jack Warner was up to his old Jedi mind tricks yesterday as he denied any knowledge that he was being investigated by the IRS as reported exclusively in Wired868. And, possibly sensing the chance to rewrite history, Warner added the bizarre claim that: “I have never faced …

Scene: Office of Acting Commissioner of Police. Phone rings. “Good morning, Stephen Williams speaking.” “Good morning, Sir. Acting Assistant Commissioner Fredericks here.” “Yes, What can I do for you, AAC Fredericks?” “Well, sir, it’s about the Minister’s new 52-point crime plan…” “Ah, yes, the crime plan. Interesting reading, isn’t it?” …

Scene: Office of the Minister of National Security Phone rings: “Good morning. Minister Warner speaking.” “Good morning, Minister.  Williams here.” “Yes, Commissioner. How can I help you?” “Well, Minister, you sent me some tips for tackling crime in East Port of Spain?” “Ah, yes. You mean the behavioural profiles?” “I …