Live Wire

A satirical spin on Trinidad and Tobago news stories

Lady PM is high maintenance

Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar said her sister Vidwatie Newton’s costly trip to India was necessary to help her with “personal issues unique to a woman.” The PM didn’t give further details, which is just as well because, to further the stereotype, men can be squeamish on feminine matters. The newly …

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Nature takes its course at Asa Wright

The Energy Ministry’s Permanent Secretary yesterday ordered a halt to quarrying at the Asa Wright Nature Centre (AWNC) after a media barrage on the issue. Energy Minister Kevin Ramnarine visited Asa Wright on Friday—at the request of the latter party—but did nothing all weekend or on Monday when the frustrated …

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Mary had a little lawsuit

Minister of Gender, Youth and Child Development Verna St Rose-Greaves said the Children’s Bill 2012 has a provision that allows a Children’s Ombudsman to sue abusers on behalf of aggrieved children. St Rose-Greaves did not give details as to how such cases would benefit the young victims, what the impact …

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Volney steps forward with reverse psychology

Justice Minister Herbert Volney thinks he is just the deputy political leader that the UNC needs since he is not from south Trinidad, Indian, Hindu, a cabal member or a politician. He probably isn’t much of a salesman either. Volney said he will run a smart campaign. Wired868 hopes it …

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PM SC follows wrong precedent

Cabinet colleagues of ex-PM ANR Robinson have denied any suggestion that Robinson took his son, David, on State trips; as PM Kamla Persad-Bissessar claimed when asked to justify spending over $200,000 in State funds to taker her sister, Vidwatie Newton, on official trips. Persad-Bissessar SC, like most lawyers, is big …

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Heath Minister drains energy drinks

Health Minister Dr Fuad Khan has warned citizens of the high caffeine and sugar levels found in energy drinks, which can lead to obesity and diabetes. One bar owner agreed energy drinks can be dangerous but cautioned that Khan’s statement might cause patrons to shy away from them and affect …

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Khan SC puts little lady in her place

Israel Khan SC called the Law Association a “glorified dance committee” under the stewardship of his long-standing friend Dana Seetahal SC and said she did absolutely nothing apart from provide rum, roti, whiskey, cheese, grapes and wine at various social events for the fraternity. Perhaps the macho Khan thinks the …

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Cable-ready travellers take flight

Airports Authority chairman Gerald Hadeed announced that his organisation has improved customer service by allowing travellers to check for Piarco International Airport flight information on channel 868 on Flow cable. Wired868 endorses this copycat move to add a touch of class to T&T’s international area code. In related news, new …

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Protect and serve… ourselves

Police Social and Welfare Association president Sgt Anand Ramesar said the PCA was wrong to fine a police corporal $520 for turning a naked rape victim away from the Morvant Police Station. Ramesar said the corporal did not assault the victim but only denied her a service, which made it …

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Six-year-old saves Grandpa Smurf

Six-year-old Tishon Camps rescued his grandfather Noel “Smurf” Luces, who suffered a stroke on Tuesday while driving on the San Fernando Bypass Road, by grabbing the steering wheel to navigate the SUV away from danger and then pulling up the handbrakes. Camps then flagged down help for his grandpa who …

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T&T savours vicious cycle

Eighteen-year-old cyclist Quincy Alexander became Trinidad and Tobago’s youngest Pan American gold medal recipient when he beat all challengers in the Kilometre Time Trial yesterday at the Julio Polet Velodrome in Mar del Plata, Argentina. Alexander’s triumph follows match sprint gold for Njisane Phillip on Monday night and augers well …

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WASA’s Name And Shame Success

WASA announced this week that it has collected more than $75.5 million from “bad pay customers” as a result of its “name and shame” campaign that started on February 1. Wired868 cannot confirm that 13 World Cup 2006 players and thousands of “baby mothers” are trying to hire WASA’s General …

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