“Rude Cop” strikes back! Live Wire roasts Express over “lewd” front page

The following is the legally satirical response to the Trinidad Express front page on 7 August 2017, which showed a fully clothed police woman on a couch with her leg raised, under the heading “Rude Cop”:

Dear Trinidad Express,

I act on behalf of my client, Ms Flexi-Cop—otherwise derogatorily referred to as “Rude Cop”—who was the victim of a most outrageous and offensive smear campaign by your establishment on 7 August 2017.

My client instructs me to inform you that, as a conscientious and forward-thinking law enforcement officer, she was preparing for her day’s duties with a series of stretching exercises, which should be bread and butter before any physical activity.

Photo: Wired868 can confirm that no animals were harmed during this depiction of the female officer’s stretching exercise.

My client’s form, grace and fitness are so outstanding and crucial to the superb execution of her duties that her colleagues often say that, if more officers follow her lead, the TTPS just might get a hold with crime. In fact, not a day goes by when Ms Flexi-Cop does not hear how fetching she looks.

My client was absolutely stunned to read your article, which suggested she was in a “lewd pose” on the job.

Lewd? Seriously?! And this from an organisation which is happy to sell pictures of half-naked young and old men, women and in-between dry humping the life out of each other every Carnival?

Allyuh didn’t know about suggestive behaviour on the job when the Express editor had “Honeybee” Gumbs buzzing around Keithos before the last election?

Allyuh knew about ethics when allyuh journalists was handing out favours for HDC houses?! Or when allyuh star political reporter was inside a holding cell cussing like she on “Basketball Wives” and smelling like the Angostura Distillery?!

I hear every man jack at the station had to put out their cigarette because the whole damn building was flammable while she was there!

Photo: Actor Marlon Wayans (left) and actress Kali Hawk recreate the Dr Rowley/Gumbs interview scene in the movie Fifty Shades of Black.
(Copyright Irish Times)

Worse, my client is outraged that your newspaper attempted to justify its story by pointing out that it was the “most read online [story]” in the Monday Express and “had been shared 744 times.”

Is that how editor in chief Omatie Lyder and her gang gauge good journalism these days? By that logic, the journalist who posts the Lendl Simmons sex video might be due a pulitzer, right?

Is Express just a print version of Facebook?

Can your establishment really defend placing the photo of a fully clothed policewoman with her leg in the air on its front page with no contextual information whatsoever?

My client is a reasonable woman. If the Trinidad Express apologises to my client and Trinidad and Tobago for its cheap grab at publicity and for further dumbing down the two island republic by senseless, shallow reporting, we are prepared to drop the matter.

Providing, of course, that your editor in chief is prepared to make the “walk of atonement” through Port of Spain—see Game of Thrones’ Season Five.

Photo: And tell her to take down the damn paywall too!

Failing that, my client is prepared to seek substantial damages in the Court of Public Opinion.

Consider this a Pre-Action Protocol (PAP) letter for your Smear.

Regards,

Mr Live Wire

Photo: St Lucia Stars captain Darren Sammy takes evasive action after a delivery from TKR bowler Kevon Cooper during CPL action at the Queen’s Park Oval on 7 August 2017.
Or, according to the Trinidad Express, Sammy was seen striking lewd poses on Monday night in the vicinity of Woodbrook.
(Courtesy Sean Morrison/Wired868)
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About Mr. Live Wire

Mr. Live Wire is an avid news reader who translates media reports for persons who can handle the truth. And satire. Unlike Jack Nicholson, he rarely yells.

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60 comments

  1. Stretching ? More like breezing.

  2. That…to me IS NOT NEWS! Really??? What is informative about that? What’s the “greater good” in publishing that pic…a front page story at that… how is that “newsworthy”? I’m very disappointed in head of news at the Trinidad Express… total waste of a salary if you ask me…

  3. Watch who you think are your friends,there are a lot of f..up ppl out here.

  4. So she want express to apologize to her…lmao for what a story they published after everyone done see it

  5. Plz Mr. Lawyer that sound so stupid, so petty. COME UP WITH AH NEXT EXCUSE…BIG TIME LAWYER AS YOU…STEUPS.

  6. Ok ppl one person some weeks post a statement about some one in high office in T&T in a few hours after the post went viral on social media / FB that person was arrested right in this case the victim did not give any one permission to post her photo or photos on social media / FB why is it that this person is not arrested as yet

  7. I think there is a penalty for posting pictures online without a person’s permission. I am pretty sure she did not give permission.

  8. Like one person commented we male cops drinking in uniform but they don’t get disciplined. One frivolous photo and she loses her job. Talk about double standards.

  9. What shit she and her lawyer talking about that she was on holiday but in full uniform

  10. Split in the middle let yuh two legs jiggle ….

  11. Careful Mr Ramdeen in the making..We never suggested your client was a ‘cheap grab’ Don’t you see how much these folk charge for extra duty, especially in high risk areas such as your client was exhibiting?

  12. I reiterate governments make decisions and we the citizens reap the nonsense, the Chinese were allowed to come in this country and set up more gambling dens that restaurants and supermarkets. When you take public transport and listen to talk shows conspiracy theories emerge,such as this new group of Chinese are not the same of old and that they may be connected to criminal elements. It makes you think when you hear such discussion. You know people on the ground knows more than what the Media feeds us conveniently, since everyone wants to be “politically correct’

  13. This is Trinidad a place o dubble standard jus like the government remember the bush whe whe man how police use to run them down lock them up kill bush whe whe an now government take it over wich is now play whe and now the Chinese come in with rulet a set of elegal gambaling an police do not worry them as they use to worry the bush whe whe man so noting in sweet tnt is a suprise

  14. “Lewd? Seriously?! And this from an organisation which is happy to sell pictures of half-naked young and old men, women and in-between dry humping the life out of each other every Carnival?” *slow *

  15. Flexi cup? Lasana why? *keeps reading*

  16. Is that fowl in the picture roasted?

  17. The person who brought this photo into the public domain is the real villain of the piece.

  18. Got a cramp in my yard and my leg stretch out jesso.

  19. where did he get this pic?? I am dying here..hahahahahahahaha

  20. “Mr Live Wire SC”…lol
    When that happened? Same time as Kamla and Anand?

  21. Where Lasana get that fowl?
    🙂

  22. That’s journalism T&T style.I’m convinced there is not editor employed at Media house given the hatred and racist commentary. This latest fuax pas concretised my opinion. A minute there I though it was the Punch or the Bomb newspaper. Desperate times calls for desperate measures, you think?

    • I won’t accuse the media of racism or race baiting though. Diminishing standards? Yes. But not racism.

    • I was referring to allowing people to write articles with racist connotations. I have noticed when I send in articles (the 3 dailies) depending on the issue I can tell you who is going to print it and who will not. I even had to tell the PNM administrators, that I have a right to comment on if I see the party going wrong or acted wrong. I had noticed that a message would come up telling me the Administrator is reviewing the comment before submission on the page, However, 48-72 hrs nothing. I pointed out to them that people made racist and nasty comments, so how come it is allowed. I have noticed that things have changed somewhat,As a citizen I believe I have right to have an opinion, I’m not a party faithful, I call a spade a spade . What is your definition of racism?

    • Rossana so you mean comment on articles or letters to the editor or actual columns?

    • Both there are some racist commentators and even letter writers which pass. Where are editors in all this, or is it sensationalism or to sell newspapers? You may have also noticed it’s the same letter writers on a weekly basis spewing their political bias. Clearly yesterdays’ front page was to sell newspapers. Where is journalistic integrity or is that non existent or obsolete?

    • Rossana I agree that they need to pay more attention to racist contributors. Definitely.
      I don’t the express editors are racist though. They just haven’t devoted the attention to that which they should.
      Matter of fact it is hard to make an excuse for it. But I think it is administrative incompetence or short sightedness or something.
      I can’t believe that happens intentionally.

    • You think the editors behaviour is an oversight? Really . I must be livign in a different country, I reiterate PERCEPTION is everything, NO explanation can be had for Mondays front page. Was that journalistic integrity (non-existent in T&T) or who is paying the piper? People condemn politicians for being corrupt, ineffective and incompetent, but I say similar behaviour emanates from among citizens including business

  23. Thanks, folks. In future, I will bake my chicken with one leg outstretched, The name? RUDE COP!…Aye, I hold the copyright!

  24. So was the express trying to bring something to the public other than crime. Was it Jest, mischief or public info?

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