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Live Wire

A satirical spin on Trinidad and Tobago news stories

Advice for the National Security adviser

The PM’s National Security adviser Gary Griffith claimed to have prior knowledge of the Police Commissioner’s pending $.9 million airplane contract prior but did not tell the PM or National Security Minister. Wired868 humbly suggests that the National Security adviser reads over his job description.

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Express, Guardian follow Wired868’s lead

Wired868 is pleased that the Trinidad Express and Guardian newspapers are following our lead in publicising former beauty queen Candice Worrell’s brave fight for her life after a brutal assault; even though neither longstanding media house could be bothered to write its own story and just lifted ours without proper accreditation. …

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Brainchild kidnapped without ransom

The Trinidad and Tobago Air Support Services suggested that its $.9 million light aircraft contract did not need to go to tender as no one else in the country can provide the service… Except for the guy who originally came up with the idea and has begged the National Security …

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National enquirers

SWRHA CEO Anil Gosine announced an impending investigation into an ambulance’s refusal to pick up a desperate mother and her since deceased 21-month-old son last Friday. The probe joins a queue that includes a bevy of UDECOTT contracts, the Piarco Airport scandal, CLICO and HCU collapses, diesel racket, Petrotrin GTL …

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Sandy takes off

National Security Minister Brigadier John Sandy performed the classic political triple pirouette on the light aircraft fiasco by insisting he was fully on top of things but not knowledgeable enough to comment while simultaneously demanding action despite knowing that everything is fine. CoP Dwayne Gibbs would be relieved for his …

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Picture this

Do staged political photo-ops belong to a simpler, bygone era? In our pick today, compliments the Trinidad Guardian, PM Kamla Persad-Bissessar pretends to drive an excavator while Ministers Fazal Karim and Roodal Moonilal squeeze beside her to presumably offer support and UWI Principal Professor Clement Sankat mans the door—in case …

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Griffith confuffles reporters

Gary Griffith, the PM’s National Security adviser, denied that the State’s military helicopters are being “pimped out” or that an inordinate sum was offered for air surveillance then turned the conversation towards previous PNM Ministers would had their lawns cut by inmates. Wired868 cannot confirm a new political mantra that …

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Forget NHA and give me a cell

Proposed new prison rules offer inmates reading material, large windows with natural light, intimate time with spouses, children and relatives as well as in-house day care centers. Displaced or financially-challenged persons arguably now have an attractive option to begging for a NHA house—or paying legal fees.

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PoS Mayor miscalculates Zero tolerance

PoS Mayor Louis Lee Sing yesterday joined the long line of politicians who don’t quite grasp zero tolerance. So Carnival revellers can be fined $1,000 or jailed for three months for bringing glass bottles to Port of Spain—unless they are using the bottles to pour into plastic cups.

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Cadiz and Verna showcase flexible morals

Trade Minister Stephen Cadiz and Social Development and Gender Affairs Minister Verna St Rose-Greaves reiterated their opposition to the death penalty yesterday before explaining that they could still support the hanging bill—thereby confirming that politicians prefer not to take their own brains or morals to Parliament.

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AG, Rowley continue name calling

The Opposition Leader called the AG “impertinent”; the AG described the Opposition Leader as classless, ignorant and arrogant. An unnamed Maraval school principal threatened both men with a toilet flush.

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Sat Punishes Principal… With Kindness

Sat Maharaj yesterday won a High Court ruling that forces Tunapuna Hindu School principal Sita Gajadharsingh-Nanga to leave the school at 3.30 pm daily. The principal reportedly insisted she was only smiling on the outside. Honest.

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