Trinidad and Tobago’s mushrooming crime problem took a turn for the worse today with news that flamboyant pseudo-crime fighter Ian Alleyne has been burgled. Once again, politics is being blamed for the blatant disregard to law and order.
Alleyne tried to put on a brave face on the sad situation in an interview with the Trinidad Guardian newspaper today.
“Life goes on,” Alleyne told the Guardian. “I will still get the job done.”
If only attorney Om Lalla could be so easily forgotten by the thousands of Crime Watch fans.

Who would smile approvingly the next time Alleyne says “allegedly” on air? Who would pretend to give free legal guidance to the dozens of petty criminals that will pass through the Crime Watch set before Christmas?
Up until the time of publication, National Security Minister Gary Griffith had not handed in his resignation but surely Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar would need a scapegoat for this scandal with a local government election looming.
The People’s Partnership pawned the blimp, reneged on the OPVs and saddled Trinidad and Tobago with an acting Commissioner of Police when gangsters are certainly not acting. But now they cannot even keep a pretend crime fighting unit together?
Inevitably, the source of the People’s Partnership’s latest embarrassment was none other than Chaguanas West MP and ILP interim leader, Jack Warner. And, not for the first time, Warner is unlikely to face prosecution for the crime.
Warner, who has kept Lalla in his pocket for years next to Oliver Camps, Anil Roberts, Winston “Gypsy” Peters and “The Original De Fosto Himself”, claimed at a public meeting last month that Alleyne was offered the post of National Security Minister during a three-way conversation with Attorney General Anand Ramlogan and Persad-Bissessar.

It is not the first time that Warner made bizarre and mischievous three-way allegations about the Attorney General.
But Alleyne swallowed the bait and, rather than use his own Crime Watch programme or the CNC3 news, chose to distance himself from the People’s Partnership by appearing on the People’s Partnership platform to refute the allegations.
Because surely if Alleyne really was a favoured child of the People’s Partnership, he would never be dumb enough to use the People’s Partnership platform as if it was an open mike at The Yard. Or something like that.
Warner promptly ordered Lalla to stop playing with Alleyne. Unconfirmed reports claim that the former FIFA vice-president insisted the attorney was “a gift” and all will be revealed in due course.
Mr Live Wire believes Persad-Bissessar should show her compassion to thousands of Crime Watch viewers and potential voters by promptly offering Alleyne the one man versatile enough to fit in any chair and capable of making inactivity look stylish.
Senator Emmanuel “Hurricane” George, Crime Watch needs a number two.
Mr. Live Wire is an avid news reader who translates media reports for persons who can handle the truth. And satire. Unlike Jack Nicholson, he rarely yells.
Poor Ian, he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed.
Ian Alleyne for sale. Text your $10 to 1-800-sellout