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Doubles vigilante confesses… to his innocence

Scene: Interview Room, Central Police Station. Investigating Officer: “So, Mr Shane Gopeesingh-Aleong, can we go over your statement again, please? Now, you said you were working in a soup kitchen all morning helping to feed women who were victims of domestic violence. Is that correct?” Shane: “Yes, sir. You see …

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Warriors make bright Caribbean Cup start

Twenty-five-year-old United States-based playmaker Keon Daniel was credited with a fine individual performance in St Kitts yesterday evening as Trinidad and Tobago shook off an early deficit to trounce French Guiana 4-1 in its opening Caribbean Cup qualifying match. Daniel, who is employed by Major League Soccer (MLS) outfit Philadelphia …

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Warner unveils new crime plan; and it’s a gag

Scene: Ministry of National Security Minister Jack Warner: “It is apparent, of course, that Rowley and his mob are responsible for the high murder rate in this country. I propose that we formulate a plan that will curb their activities and allow the people of Laventille to live in peace” …

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Lies, damn lies and statistics

Scene: An unknown place of great beauty Jack Warner (looking around, bewildered): “Who are you?” Deity: “I am known by many names, but you would know me as God.” Jack: “God? But you don’t look anything like Morgan Freeman!” God: “Sigh. Ever since “Bruce Almighty” everyone seems disappointed when they …

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Warner, Wired868 grieve for 2012’s last murder victim

King Canute almost found the answer to global warning. The Danish King strode to the seaside and commanded the tide to stop rising. Simplicity is thought to be golden; but not in this case. Canute ended up wetter than Ian Alleyne. National Security Minister Jack Warner, faced with a stubborn …

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Warner misquotes himself over controversial letter

National Security Minister Jack Warner further highlighted the importance of Wired868 after he misquoted himself during his budget contribution yesterday. Warner claimed to have told Sport Minister Anil Roberts, in a letter on government letterhead, that: “and therefore I would suggest that you tell them (TTFF) the gravity of the situation …

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iGovTT’s expensive passenger

iGovTT chairman Atiba Phillips was revealed to be an expensive passenger after the Trinidad Express revealed that he racked up over $69,000 in allegedly unapproved spending, inclusive of $23,835.50 in 40 taxi transactions despite the fact that he gets a $1,000 monthly travel allowance. One February ride from his Carenage …

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Cabinet FC prepares for Budget second leg

Scene: Emergency meeting of Cabinet Football Club Kamla: “My friends, we’re here today to discuss the alarming run of defeats that we have suffered over the last few months at the hands of the Opposition.” Anil: “We’ve give the fans stuff to cheer about too, boss.” Kamla: “Yes but that was …

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Caledonia’s First Citizens Cup withdrawal

Neal & Massy Caledonia AIA made its first significant deposit of the 2012/13 season on Friday night as the “Eastern Stallions” captured the First Citizens Cup at the Hasely Crawford Stadium, Port of Spain after a 2-1 win over Defence Force. If the outcome was predictable for the Caribbean champions, …

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Warriors vow to repay fans with Caribbean title

Trinidad and Tobago national football team captain and goalkeeper Jan-Michael Williams promised to repay fans with success in the 2012 Caribbean Cup tournament as the “Soca Warriors” go through their final preparations for next week’s group contest. The 20-man squad was selected today by interim head coach Hutson “Barber” Charles …

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