Prisons go green: But how will it affect Chaguanas West?

Mr. Live Wire Friday 19 July 2013 Live Wire 1 Comment

In a radical new move engineered by Food Production Minister Devant Maharaj and Justice Minister Christlyn Moore, convicted prisoners will soon be mandated to work in the agricultural sector.

Maharaj explained that the scheme was part of the prisoners’ rehabilitation and offers them the chance to earn a new life skill. Because who would risk a life of crime when there is the financially attractive and esteem-building option of working as a labourer on any one of Trinidad and Tobago’s disappearing green spaces?

Photo: I've only ever reaped what I sowed... If only someone had told me about politics! — Photo: I’ve only ever reaped what I sowed… If only someone had told me about politics!

Mr Live Wire has been unreliably informed that the chance to learn the finer points of agriculture was met with enthusiasm by the majority of prisoners who are set to be released in the 1960s. Reportedly, some detainees argued that they should learn a slightly less dated life skill; like how to fix cassette recorders.

Presumably, more relevant expertise like creative accounting, hypocrisy 101, fixing tenders and passing the buck were not offered as it may put convicts in direct competition with Cabinet members for future employment opportunities.

Mr Live Wire would like to stress that “passing the buck” deals solely with blame delegation and is in no way, shape or form related to the act of redistributing wealth throughout the society.

Still, the prisoners are not completely without opportunities.

Chaguanas West candidate Jack Warner is understood to be grateful for the HR services rendered by Moore and Maharaj and is anxious to recruit more like-minded “green thumbs” to help his by-election campaign. PNM candidate Avinash Singh has already likened Warner’s ILP group to a zaboca party, which is green on the outside and yellow on the inside.

Photo: Help which political party? We've had enough of crime... Just leave us with our dignity! — Photo: Help which political party? We’ve had enough of crime… Just leave us with our dignity!

What is the difference between politicians and prisoners?

Most get into the big house by nefarious means, even the innocent ones are quickly corrupted, few serve any use whatsoever to the public and everyone spends more time watching their backs and behinds than thinking about helping the communities that put them there.

However, prisoners get more exercise, rarely speak in the third person and wear more practical clothes.