Home / Live Wire / Jack’s Lynch-ing; US AG sends invite for Warner family reunion

Jack’s Lynch-ing; US AG sends invite for Warner family reunion

Chaguanas West MP Jack Warner, like so many scandal-engulfed politicians before him, looks set to quit his day job to “spend more time with his family.”

Only this time, it will be no empty platitude.

Photo: United States Attorney General Loretta E Lynch seems decidedly unlikely to fall for Jack Warner's charms.
Photo: United States Attorney General Loretta E Lynch seems decidedly unlikely to fall for Jack Warner’s charms.

After three years of giving United States law officials the wide berth by avoiding airports—and probably crossing the street whenever he neared a McDonald’s—Warner finally has a one-way ticket to the States on his horizons after United States Attorney General Loretta E Lynch signed him for a dirty dozen of racketeering charges.

Mr Live Wire is not saying that Warner’s goose looks well done. He’s just saying that the last time we say US lawmen this excited; Osama Bin Laden was in a bodybag.

That Jack isn’t just getting hanged. It’s being Lynch-ed!

Before the Lynch-ing, comes the extradition case. And there will be something fitting about seeing Warner sold dreams while his pockets are emptied by lawyers who, no doubt, won’t be at the waving gallery to see him off.

But enough about his time with Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar SC…

Photo: Ex-FIFA vice-president Jack Warner (left) and Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar share a light moment during the 2010 FIFA Under-17 Women's World Cup in Trinidad and Tobago. Warner served as Works Minister and National Security Minister for the People's Partnership Government before his resignation in 2013. (Courtesy FIFA.com)
Photo: Ex-FIFA vice-president Jack Warner (left) and Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar share a light moment during the 2010 FIFA Under-17 Women’s World Cup in Trinidad and Tobago.
Warner served as Works Minister and National Security Minister for the People’s Partnership Government before his resignation in 2013.
(Courtesy FIFA.com)

Take our advice, Jack. Forget about blowing money on QCs and SCs and get Kevin Hart on the phone for some prison survival techniques.

There is more than a fair chance that Warner will soon have the most awkward family reunion outside of a Tyler Perry movie, when he comes face to face with his sons, Daryan and Daryll. The men he allegedly tutored in a life of a white-collar crime and then abandoned when the FBI pinched them in Miami.

Daryan and Daryll: “What the hell, dad! How could you desert us? We sent you a message saying the FBI had us under arrest!”

Jack: “Really? I thought you said: ‘FYI, the house is in a mess.’ Naturally, I left you guys to clean up after yourselves.”

Warner, a former FIFA vice-president and the People’s Partnership Government’s one-time acting Prime Minister, has retreated so far into his own dreamworld over the years that not even Leonardo DiCaprio would risk looking for him.

Photo: Chaguanas West MP and ex-FIFA vice-president Jack Warner.
Photo: Chaguanas West MP and ex-FIFA vice-president Jack Warner.

The millionaire football official once expressed surprise at former Planning Minister Mary King’s demise over a $100,000 State contract by describing the sum as “lunch money.”

Last night, Warner supposedly had a simple meal with spinach at the prison infirmary. His days of feasting with kings seem over. After securing his $2.5 million bail today, he left jail in an ambulance due, authorities claimed, to exhaustion.

Trinidad and Tobago—and much of the football world—is tired of him too.

Warner once posted bail for the likes of Ish Galbaransingh, Steve Ferguson and Oma Panday. No such benefactors showed up when his time of reckoning came.

Not even ex-TTFA president Oliver Camps dropped in to lift his spirit with a sing-along of Machel Montano’s “Pop a bottle.” Live Wire cannot confirm that Warner hummed “Single forever” instead.

Party done.

Photo: Ex-FIFA VP Jack Warner is looking at a possible 20-year jail sentence in the United States.
Photo: Ex-FIFA VP Jack Warner is looking at a possible 20-year jail sentence in the United States.

The most powerful sporting administrator that the Caribbean has ever seen, Warner allegedly abused his power to enrich himself rather than lift regional football.

And his claims of being a modern day “Robin Hood” were almost as nonsensical as the suggestion that the FBI arrested him to destroy the ILP’s chances of losing at least 40 deposits to the Elections & Boundaries Commission (EBC) at the 2015 General Elections.

Warner was never what he appeared to be. And he may soon discover that the self-declared “Land of the Free” does not always live up to its billing either.

At least he will soon be in close proximity with his sons again. Although it is not quite as heartwarming a tale as “Finding Nemo.”

Photo: The world's worst karaoke effort. Ex-FIFA vice-president Jack Warner (right) and his son Daryan politely respond to a question from then Trinidad Express reporter Lasana Liburd on the Simpaul Travel 2006 World Cup ticket scandal.
Photo: The world’s worst karaoke effort.
Ex-FIFA vice-president Jack Warner (right) and his son Daryan politely respond to a question from then Trinidad Express reporter Lasana Liburd on the Simpaul Travel 2006 World Cup ticket scandal.

Christmas shopping will surely be awkward for the Warner family. What do you get a career criminal who had everything?

Mr Live Wire suggests ankle bracelets. And “Oz: The Complete Seasons 1-6.”

About Mr. Live Wire

Mr. Live Wire
Mr. Live Wire is an avid news reader who translates media reports for persons who can handle the truth. And satire. Unlike Jack Nicholson, he rarely yells.

Check Also

From ‘kaisoca’ to ‘shittykyahkyah soccer’; Best muses on TTFA elections and Nov 19

At 11pm last night, I turned my TV off. Honduras 4, T&T 0. I had …

113 comments

  1. More than likely they would have seen the evidence. They are probably waiting for the evidence to be authenticated by US authorities.

  2. Trinis listen, we must at least be protected by our own government. It is not justice when an extradition is requested and we acquiesced without even giving consideration to reading the requisite papers. We should have told those Americans that we will consider same, take sufficient time to read the papers, even if it took a month and then, if we are satisfied that there is sufficient evidence after consulting our senior lawyers then sign the papers. Saying the paper work was too bulky and agreeing to sign them within 15 minutes without due consideration for our citizen is unfair. This could have been anyone of us.

  3. I’ll wait to see the evidence. it’s weird that Trinidadians have so much faith in the US justice system. Based on what?

  4. for years America supported FIFA corruption why cry wolf know ,Jack was you or any FIFA official spying for the USA that went sour world leaders supported FIFA corruption including the USA

    If Jack have to go so must the entire PP Government they were spending the money too and what happen to ISH and Steve , Jack spill the bean it is bigger than the world thinks

  5. Went for a lil 5 days in Tobago and look at shit take place not 2 days into my holiday. And we have a few Houdini’s here Savitri Maharaj . They’re all slippery, fall through the cracks and land on their feet. Not holding my breath for anything. Looking on at the circus.

  6. I just realized if Jack Warner was still representing Trinidad and Tobago/CONCACAF he would have been arrested in Zurich Switzerland. Man, becoming the new teflon personality, yes.

  7. well, any files on blatter he was hoping to buss might now be useless/weakened with that win today. What can he use as leverage with the Dept of Justice…to make a deal for himself and his children? If he cares enough…Maybe it is as Alana says. DoJ not going to fall for the smart man talk which we trinis love.

  8. And all who benefited from his monies should have to give evidence

  9. Brian TriniOne, thanks eh i thought he was comingling again

  10. Blazer got a rude awakening. the Feds squeezed him like an over ripe pimple. He knew what time it was and he decided keeping secrets wasn’t in his best interests any longer.

  11. Jack feel the rest of the world living in the 9 day wonder like Trinidad. Laws over there ain’t like here where you ignore them until you see the police coming or passing. Also not everybody is yuh partner, some ah dem trinis does do like dey eh know yuh. So Jack thought Blazer was he boi but as the old ppl say that was another thought coming

  12. Jack feels that we should protect him. He feels being in government protects him. He says his sons did nothing wrong and since FIFA is in Zurich, if he stole from FIFA then no one outside should study that. Jack is a sociopath.

  13. LOL!!!! One of your better ones to date LL !!! 😀 😀 😀

  14. Savitri: I am a quick one-finger typist. LOL. The other lawyer was an ILP lawyer.

  15. Lasana a business whiz in Trinidad wouldn’t cut it in the real world where there are actual laws regulating how business is to be conducted.

  16. And here they masquerade as business whizzes. :-/

  17. Hear nah……….
    Dey rely bungle it yuh know?

  18. Each one dumber than the last? LOL

  19. Vernal…Now you know why I call them Daryl & Daryl
    remember Multiplicity the movie?

  20. I wouldn’t send them with money to buy two quart ah hops!

  21. More like he send Larry & Moe..

  22. Jack move like Saddam, he send Uday and Qusay to do the risky work while he safe in he spider-hole.

    And by spider-hole ah mean Chagauanas West! Hahaha

  23. So wait?! Allyuh feel was only Jack spending money?! Dem is big men and knew what time it was. All pot sit on dey own bottom now.

  24. Jack look as if he have time with with them? They in custody and Jack studying Tanty and T&T elections

  25. I still studying how Jack send he son tuh distribute he ill gotten money between several banks in New York.
    He rely doh like he children or what?

  26. Yeah..I does raise mine in fete

  27. All yuh flag is red Mel, so when people see it dey does just sing forge! Hahaha

  28. Well it’s ‘supposed’ to raise red flags here too but..

  29. He should have put it in a safety deposit box! LOL

  30. Real amateurish operation there…..

  31. Yeah, that doesn’t work in real countries where best practices are the norm.
    That type of transaction raises red flags immediately because above all else Uncle Sam will not be denied his taxes!

  32. He thought he was in sweet T&T

  33. I laughed at that last night..

  34. This bit on Daryan Warner got me:
    “In one case, a teller at a JPMorgan Chase branch on New York’s Broadway said she had asked somebody for his driver’s license when he wanted to deposit 7,500 euros, which at the time translated to an amount just above the reporting threshold.

    The person then asked to be handed back 500 euros, which lowered the sum to $9,336.60. Earlier that day, a similar amount had been deposited at JPMorgan in Queens. The following day, another 7,000 euros was deposited at the Broadway branch.”

    Hilarious. They think every bank is like First Citizens.

  35. ^^^ it hard…yeah, it hard!

  36. oooooh gooooode!!!
    “Before the Lynch-ing, comes the extradition case. And there will be something fitting about seeing Warner sold dreams while his pockets are emptied by lawyers who, no doubt, won’t be at the waving gallery to see him off.

    But enough about his time with Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar SC…”

  37. Luck until after the elections where they would have no diplomatic immunity.

  38. He’s like a drowning swimmer, frantic to save himself he instinctively attemps to use nearby swimmers as flotation devices.
    Little does he know that it’s only luck keeping Kamla’s head above water, all of them might drown!

  39. Greer Cave, I think Jack Warner is desperate. Yes, he is trying to intimidate the Prime Minister. That’s what you get for partnering with characters like that.

  40. He bailed out Panday, Ferguson and Galbaransingh? Wow.

  41. Until the time reach when he realised that he’s the crapaud. Now he want to say he’s just a frog in a crapaud suit

  42. Greer Cave you might be right, he might very well see himself as just a guppy compared to Blatter.
    But in Jack’s own words “male crapaud female crapaud, same handful of salt”!

  43. I’m not in denial Christopher, Jack is

  44. Right now Jack is concerned with himself. Any other parent would have already been in the US from day one to protect their offspring even at their own demise. Jack is trying to save himself and if he can’t he’ll take a few ppl down with him for company

  45. Greer, you are in denial. He is in serious trouble. His real battle is against the U.S criminal justice system. Trinidad issues is kids stuff compared

  46. Greer – he’s not worried?? Is he the only person who doesn’t know that his two sons pleaded guilty and are facing 10 years in prison?? The PM can do nothing to change that. Forget her and focus on your sons. Guess they don’t make parents like they used to. Smfh.

  47. Chabeth, it is clear that he is on the war path. He intends to inflict as much damage that he can before elections. The question is whether he has a smoking gun?

  48. I don’t think he’s worried because in his mind he has done nothing wrong and he sees himself as a guppy compared to Blatter. Jack is not a fool and he’s playing with the PM and goading her into giving him what he wants – not to be eradicated. If I go down so do you mentality. It’s left to be seen if she gives in or leave him hanging, depends on how much is she and her govt willing to lose.

  49. He needs to give up every white collar criminal he knows. Hopefully they all passed money through the US and/or had meetings in the US.

  50. Jack is trying to create his own narrative for the Trinidad public.
    He’s a fool, he needs to worry about the Feds.

  51. He’s been couped up in the banana too long.
    Instead of speaking at political rallies he ought to be talking to the Feds. Whatever information he has would serve him best there.
    Same goes for Kamla!

  52. And Savitri, that black/indian thing will get worse if jack is extradited and Steve and ish are not. Ignore it.

  53. Even Jack sounding like he doesn’t understand this wasn’t a FIFA investigation.

  54. Chuck Blazer is from a “third world” country? And how many of the CONCACAF countries are not “third world”?

  55. Jack talking ah-pack-ah-ass.
    He’s a common racketeers and like all common racketeers before him he will bring down every other common racketeer of whose racket he has intimidate knowledge out of pure bitterness for getting caught.

    • Anyone in for a game of BLACK Jack….it’s quite easy to play
      …just look for a Black object of prominence and cut it down to the ground….no major requirements really other than you yourself must be BLACK….

      Remember, only prominent blacks to attack so please leave Ish and all other non-blacks who have raped this country, alone….its a Black on Black…Attack….

  56. We lucky he used “third world countries” as i see some people saying black person and not indian…steups. that is why i stop engaging…

  57. First of all if Jack knew that his practices at Fifa was illegal immoral and unethical why did he engage in it?
    Next is so what if only third world countries are prosecuted for illegal activities? That is not an excuse.
    And lastly if Jack had dirt on Kamla all this time why did he protect her, not because that dirt also soils himself?

    Only among infants and in Trinidad is a valid explanation for wrongdoing “well dem do it too”!

  58. Buh Leslie-Ann dais only 3 lawyers…with 4 tapes?

  59. Kudos Mr. Live Wire! Superbly written! Did you have this one on ice…or was it just as easy to write as it was to read?
    “Red over red over please send”… Jack Warner right over… (has a certain ring to it!)
    Oh boy…family reunions can be so awkward….this one will surely beat them all…no DVDs for them, let them face each other…and reality….maybe for the first time in their lives…ankle bracelets are good though! Thoroughly enjoyed this!

  60. Those excerpts wee taken from a post by Brian TriniOne Lewis

  61. Excerpts from Jack Warners speech moments ago. I was typing as he spoke.

    ——————————————————————————-
    Kamla put me in jail?!!

    AS OF TONIGHT – ALL GLOVES ARE OFF.

    And if Kamla has a soft chin, that is her business.

    Everything I have against Kamla… I ILL BRING IT OUT

    I have kept it back too long and I will bring it out… But not tonight!

    The way they going, my life feels threatened. I will make 4 copies of avideo and give it to 4 lawyers. One to a PNM lawyer, one to MSJ lawyer, and one to my lawyer.

    Kamla say that I never finance her financially in 2010.

    I TELL YOU SHE LIE.

    And I will tell you how I was so disgusted with all the people Kamla and I went to get money from. I get fed up and Stacey (Roopnarine) walked in.

    Tonight I tell you – JACK IS ALIVE AND KICKING!

    My past has been grim and brutal because of Kamla and her government.

    Tomorrow night at 7pm…. The show goes on from next week. BBC yuh coming back in June? In June? Cause from June DE FIRE START… ALL GLOVES ARE OFF!

    Why is it that only 3rd World Countries are charged. This is MUCH BIGGER THAN YOU THINK. We here are too simple – this issue is much bigger than you think.

  62. Warner: Everything I have against Kamla, I will bring it out. I have kept it back for too long. I will bring it out but not tonight.

  63. Yes, where are his friends now ?

  64. I think I overheard Jack thanking the Americans for their kind offer to facilitate this ”family reunion”……but at the same time he was heard telling them they could shove their offer where the SUNdon’tSHINE.

  65. Ent?! I not holding my breath…

  66. The long awaited and much ballyhooed tsunami!

  67. He said they put him in jail..so

  68. This is not the first time JW made such a statement. However this time maybe he has a greater reason to disclose if only to be vindictive and revengeful.

  69. Nah, the second one is only to correct the date from the first one!

  70. A second one to correct the first one

  71. There is absolutely nothing Jack Warner can do to Kamla that a simple letter of vindication from Jack Russo can’t undo! LOL

  72. My word Nicole!! But I not buying cat in bag. I waiting to see the gloves actually come off.

  73. Huh he still giving speeches?

  74. Anyone listened to the ILP meeting just now? Jack declare war on Kmler! The gloves are off he said lol

  75. HITTING HARD, SANA, REAL HARD. SEEING YOUR FACE WRITING THIS!!!

  76. First chance I got to write in hours. Had to throw in something from Live Wire 🙂

  77. ot even ex-TTFA president Oliver Camps dropped in to lift his spirit with a sing-along of Machel Montano’s “Pop a bottle.” Live Wire cannot confirmed that Warner hummed “Single forever” instead.

    That is the best part of the piece!!! While poppin bottles, JaWa will be single forever…or not…and when the toast is made at the reunion, he will sing out CHEERS!!!!!

    That’s for you Lasana

  78. Gaiven Clairmont

    All I can say is LMFAO (mischevious laughter)

  79. Hahaha. Nice one Ravi Maharaj!

  80. Hahahahah Buju will be serenading the function or whA

  81. Hold on tight Jack, hope you enjoyed the high life because its going to be a rough and bumpy ride from here on out.

  82. He’s a contortionist…lets see how far this reaches….looking widespread….Im sure he has tales to tell. He knew thos was coming since 2013 when his sons were arrested

  83. Well I’m wondering what further explanation you need

  84. Good write Lasana. Made for interesting reading. Cheers.

  85. Yup! All his friends have now abandoned him

  86. Christopher? You been under a very large rock the last two days?!!!!!!

  87. Is time for your Pulitzer prize,Lasana.

  88. Trinis do criminality world-class, and inter-generationally! We are not easy!