Scene: Port of Spain General Hospital.
Wired868 Journalist (to camera): “Today we have seen extraordinary scenes here in Port of Spain, after Trinidad and Tobago Football was found abused and battered at an undisclosed location in the capital. The authorities are treating this as a case of an attempted murder.
“I have with me here Mr Brent Sancho, a former national footballer who, together with 12 teammates, testified before the High Court about years of abuse suffered at the hands of the Trinidad and Tobago Football Federation (TTFF) and its former partner Jack Warner. Mr Sancho, you obviously cannot say much as investigations are at a sensitive stage. But can you at least give us your thoughts on the state of Football?”
Sancho: “Well, this has always been coming. It was obvious to me for some time that the situation was deteriorating rapidly and my heart really goes out to Football today.”
Journalist: “Police sources spoke of systematic abuse of Football, who was loved and cherished by tens of thousands of Trinbagonians. It is also apparent that this abuse came at the hands of persons who, publicly, appeared to love and nurture Football for so long.
“And yet, in the end, Football appeared to be imprisoned and denied the most basic sustenance. Mr Sancho, should this abuse have been spotted and stopped earlier?”

(Courtesy Patricia “Brownsugar” Smart)
Sancho: “Well, we know that there were consistent complaints made to the TTFF, whose role as caretaker is very questionable I think. In fact, she said to me in the past that she was abused too. But time will tell whether she tried to help Football or was actually suppressing evidence and obstructing investigations.”
Journalist: “I also have with me Mr Selby Browne, who is Vice Chairman of the Veteran Footballers Foundation. Mr Browne, how do you feel about the role played by the former Minister of Sport, Anil Roberts?”
Browne: “We knew that others were involved in the defiling of Football and I understand Wired868 published a letter that suggested the Sport Minister was not innocent of this at all. This man, Roberts, was in a position of trust and the country believed he would do the right thing. He had the opportunity to stop all of this but instead…”
(Browne breaks down in tears and ends the interview)
Journalist: “Wired868 director and investigative journalist Lasana Liburd, written for over a decade on signs that suggested Football’s relationship with the TTFF and its former special advisor was far from wholesome. Mr Liburd, why did the authorities not act sooner?”
Liburd: “I think it always easier for people to look the other way and hope that things sort themselves out or try to convince themselves that maybe it wasn’t as bad as it seemed. You could see that Football was not itself from the way it played with its neighbours and from its increasingly reclusive nature. But why beat around the bush? The person involved in the case might be trying to keep a safe distance but everyone knows that…”
(Journalist abruptly ends the interview to sprint after Opposition Leader Keith Rowley. She eventually corners him after running for two blocks and darting through moving traffic.)
Journalist: “I have with me (panting) the leader of the Opposition, Dr Keith Rowley. Dr Rowley, it’s been said that you (pant) should have done more to prevent this.”
Rowley: “Let me start by saying that my thoughts and prayers go out to Football who is trying to recover from the maliciousness of the People’s Partnership. I hasten to add that it was the Prime Minister’s responsibility to safeguard Football but she was happy to pass the buck and just kept parroting that tired line that ‘allegations were no proof of wrongdoing’.”
Journalist: “Yes. But much of the alleged abuse occurred while the PNM was in power and yet your party did nothing. Were you compliant by your own lack of interest?”

(Courtesy Yahoo Sports)
Rowley: “Clearly the support structures in place were inadequate. Had we had irrefutable proof that the abuse was taking place, we would have stepped in. I never knew Football well. I always preferred individual sports…”
Journalist: “Well, this has been a harrowing report and it remains uncertain whether Football will recover. But we will strike to keep you updated at Wired868 where our thoughts go out to Football and the people who hold the sport dear – the people of Trinidad & Tobago. Thank you.”
Editor’s Note: This column is pure satire and all conversations are faked; no offence is meant at parties named although they probably deserve it
Filbert Street is a real columnist who works in a fantasy world that sometimes resembles our own.
I wish a speedy recovery to Football, but really don’t see it happening, not the way things are currently…it could be a good election platform in a couple of years though….