Pause for a second and picture the most uncaring, criminally-minded person you ever met or heard of in Trinidad and Tobago. Now picture that person with over $17 million at his disposal.
It can put a damper on your tidings of joy, huh?
Mr Live Wire has a few concerns this Christmas for his two-island republic:
(Security)
Thief from thief made God laugh; but it would be no joking matter if they were fighting over nearly $18 million.
Two years ago, the Prime Minister called a State of Emergency for six months because of a bogus death threat, some unrelated murders and arguably other reasons we are still not clear on.
Using that reaction as a gauge, maybe Kamla Persad-Bissessar is on her way to the United Nations right now to ask for the Coalition forces to come give us a parang.
(The Roman Abramovich effect)
How this works is that a new “Mr Big” shows up with enough cash to poach the best talent from every nook and cranny and create his own villainous all-star team.
The former crime bosses who want to compete are forced to use the law enforcement agencies to clip the new powerbroker’s influence while trying to raise cash quickly to compete in the labour market.
Increased violent confrontations on the streets and criminal activities everywhere else could mean that Santa Claus would be keeping an eye out for travel advisories this Christmas.
(Expansion)
There are probably real estate agents applying lipstick and practising their handshakes right now. Government ministers will not be the only people who are buying million dollar properties with cash over the holidays.
But enterprises worth their salt must keep expanding or risk a takeover. Word on the street is that $30,000 worth of product from Colombia can be sold for as much as £45,000 in London. So what do you think $17 million can earn?
Gary Griffith must give his Coast Guards the type of artillery and training they will need to save the borders and their own lives; or provide them without enough white sheets to surrender in style.
(Loose ends)
Forget Calder Hart and Jack Warner for a second and throw every possible resource into finding the errors in this heist. Even a seemingly flawless plan has a loose end or two and Mr Big might be working on getting rid of those himself.
Sentinel Security was supposedly chosen to transport this cash to Tobago because it could drive right on to the tarmac where the two security officials could load the cash and then catch the flight themselves.
So, as one poster pointed out, who was responsible for taking the security van off the tarmac? Should there not have been a third guard involved?
It is a matter of national importance that every detail of this case is examined carefully and rigorously.
(Political implications)
Of course, real estate agents are not the only people who accept large cash deposits. SIS head Kenneth Lalla told a Judge that he gave Jack Warner $30 million in cash as a UNC campaign donation for one general election.
We also know that politicians have insisted on keeping their financiers secret. So who is to say that Mr Bigs does not see politics as something that can also offer a wonderful return for his investment?
Ishwar Galbaransingh certainly got his money’s worth.
(Good news)
Luckily, Mr Live Wire is a cat with a rubik cube, not a detective; and this entire column is the product of a vivid imagination. Phew!
If there really was something to worry about, we would surely have heard something from our leaders by now on this subject.
Happy Holidays, Trinidad and Tobago.
Mr. Live Wire is an avid news reader who translates media reports for persons who can handle the truth. And satire. Unlike Jack Nicholson, he rarely yells.
You read and you laugh and then you realise what you’ve just read and the laughter turns into a kind of frozen grin that, in the mirror, betrays your innermost fears. This is brilliant stuff.