Proposed new prison rules offer inmates reading material, large windows with natural light, intimate time with spouses, children and relatives as well as in-house day care centers. Displaced or financially-challenged persons arguably now have an attractive option to begging for a NHA house—or paying legal fees. More from Wired868 Free …

PoS Mayor Louis Lee Sing yesterday joined the long line of politicians who don’t quite grasp zero tolerance. So Carnival revellers can be fined $1,000 or jailed for three months for bringing glass bottles to Port of Spain—unless they are using the bottles to pour into plastic cups. More from …

Trade Minister Stephen Cadiz and Social Development and Gender Affairs Minister Verna St Rose-Greaves reiterated their opposition to the death penalty yesterday before explaining that they could still support the hanging bill—thereby confirming that politicians prefer not to take their own brains or morals to Parliament. More from Wired868 Live …

The Opposition Leader called the AG “impertinent”; the AG described the Opposition Leader as classless, ignorant and arrogant. An unnamed Maraval school principal threatened both men with a toilet flush. More from Wired868 Missing the Faris for the trees? Mr Live Wire gets another political lecture from a mysterious man …

Sat Maharaj yesterday won a High Court ruling that forces Tunapuna Hindu School principal Sita Gajadharsingh-Nanga to leave the school at 3.30 pm daily. The principal reportedly insisted she was only smiling on the outside. Honest. More from Wired868 A Massive Count?! Live Wire considers underlying issue as Gosein takes …

A female primary school teacher was quizzed by St Clair police yesterday after flushing an eight-year-old boy’s head in a toilet bowl. The teacher is rumoured to have described her action as an enhanced interrogation technique. More from Wired868 Moderate THA debate leaves candidates un-flushed The three candidates for the …

Health Minister Dr Fuad Khan said that ex-PM Patrick Manning is improving since suffering a mild stroke and even gave him a “thumbs up” after a hospital visit yesterday. Wired868 could not confirm whether Khan was wearing his glasses and if he is sure about which finger Manning used. More …

Opposition Leader Keith Rowley believes that political indecisiveness by the People’s Partnership is behind a rise in murders. Gangsters confirmed that the lapse in the Hanging Bill was decisive in their devilish actions and justified the long hours they spend watching the Parliament channel. More from Wired868 Missing the Faris …

Yes, Sport Minister Anil Roberts offered to put wealthy local cricketers Dwayne Bravo and Kieron Pollard on his Elite Athlete Funding Program. No, he still disagrees with the NAAA’s assertion that he treats State funds like his own bank account. More from Wired868 Faris’ gun-toting kids, Alleyne’s pity party, Cazabon’s …

Sacked PSC chairman Nizam Mohammed is suing the State after being dismissed for inflammatory statements around racial lines. Mohammed believes that parliamentary privilege is like “time” during a game of catch at recess. More from Wired868 A Massive Count?! Live Wire considers underlying issue as Gosein takes Rowley’s mudda for …

PM Kamla Persad-Bissessar said that change at the MSJ party would not affect the flavor of the People’s Partnership. Wired868 cannot confirm that she then asked her aide: “MSJ is what they put in Chinese food, right?” More from Wired868 Protesters push back against ‘little prick’; Live Wire alarmed as …

Sacked SAUTT Brigadier Peter Joseph apparently joined dismissed SWRHA ex-CEO Paula Chester-Cumberbatch in collecting massive cheques for wrongful dismissal by the State. The only thing better than keeping your government job, seems to be losing it. More from Wired868 Fitzie loses his Works, Works, Works, Works! Keithos turns to Ish …