Mr. Live Wire

Mr. Live Wire is an avid news reader who translates media reports for persons who can handle the truth. And satire. Unlike Jack Nicholson, he rarely yells.

Kisses cost extra

Kiss Baking Company raised the price of its products by between 50 cents to $1 on Monday and finally got around to offering a public explanation of sorts, three days later. Customers insist that, at these new prices, they should at least get a cuddle too. More from Wired868

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Toilet principal unflushed

Blackman’s Private School principal Arlene Blackman was yesterday charged on two counts of cruelty after allegedly flushing the heads of two students in a school toilet; or, in American jargon, adding First World “intensive, interrogation techniques” to the school’s disciplinary code. Blackman faces a fine of between $5,000 and $10,000 …

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Gypsy abandons sinking ship

Culture Minister Winston “Gypsy” Peters is among three government ministers who refused to support MP Jack Warner’s hanging petition on the grounds that Cabinet does their thinking for them. Gypsy, who once supported Warner’s fight against ex-UNC leader Basdeo Panday, knows a thing or two about sinking ships. In other …

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A Wasa time

WASA, which was formed by an Act of Parliament in 1965, still doesn’t know what it is doing and will pay a Spanish consultancy firm $5.2 million for four months of recommendations. Wired868 expects the first recommendation to be: Get someone to fix your problems, not talk about them. More …

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Express stalks Manning

The family and colleagues of ex-PM Patrick Manning have tried to keep his medical business private while he recovers from a stroke but the Trinidad Express persists on publishing scoops from unnamed sources regarding his health. Wired868 understands that Manning may or may not be dictating a message for “Janice …

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Ish, is that you?

The US Embassy is appealing for assistance in locating an American fugitive believed to be hiding in Trinidad and Tobago. The man has several known aliases; none of which, apparently, is Ish or Steve. More from Wired868 Fitzie loses his Works, Works, Works, Works! Keithos turns to Ish and Warner’s …

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Advice for the National Security adviser

The PM’s National Security adviser Gary Griffith claimed to have prior knowledge of the Police Commissioner’s pending $.9 million airplane contract prior but did not tell the PM or National Security Minister. Wired868 humbly suggests that the National Security adviser reads over his job description. More from Wired868 No, Faris, …

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Express, Guardian follow Wired868’s lead

Wired868 is pleased that the Trinidad Express and Guardian newspapers are following our lead in publicising former beauty queen Candice Worrell’s brave fight for her life after a brutal assault; even though neither longstanding media house could be bothered to write its own story and just lifted ours without proper accreditation. …

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Brainchild kidnapped without ransom

The Trinidad and Tobago Air Support Services suggested that its $.9 million light aircraft contract did not need to go to tender as no one else in the country can provide the service… Except for the guy who originally came up with the idea and has begged the National Security …

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National enquirers

SWRHA CEO Anil Gosine announced an impending investigation into an ambulance’s refusal to pick up a desperate mother and her since deceased 21-month-old son last Friday. The probe joins a queue that includes a bevy of UDECOTT contracts, the Piarco Airport scandal, CLICO and HCU collapses, diesel racket, Petrotrin GTL …

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Sandy takes off

National Security Minister Brigadier John Sandy performed the classic political triple pirouette on the light aircraft fiasco by insisting he was fully on top of things but not knowledgeable enough to comment while simultaneously demanding action despite knowing that everything is fine. CoP Dwayne Gibbs would be relieved for his …

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Picture this

Do staged political photo-ops belong to a simpler, bygone era? In our pick today, compliments the Trinidad Guardian, PM Kamla Persad-Bissessar pretends to drive an excavator while Ministers Fazal Karim and Roodal Moonilal squeeze beside her to presumably offer support and UWI Principal Professor Clement Sankat mans the door—in case …

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