Live Wire notes: LifeSport rebooted, SIS’ land grab and trolling Anand

If God is really a Trini, then he must be a Jehovah’s Witness. Because He certainly has not shown the stomach for intervening in local political affairs.

Another weekend and another round of head shaking news as Trinidad and Tobago journalists try to keep up with what passes for administration in these parts.

First up, the sleepy Minister of Energy, Kevin Ramnarine, who failed to notice that the State-owned National Gas Company was strategically distributing millions of dollars around the country and recording the money trail through a map of the 41 constituencies.

Because everyone tallies charitable work via Electoral Boundaries and Commission (EBC) lines, not so?

Photo: Energy Minister Kevin Ramnarine.
Photo: Energy Minister Kevin Ramnarine.

“As I have previously mentioned, my ministerial responsibilities do not mandate that I micro-manage the NGC,” Ramnarine told the Sunday Express, “nor do I manage the company on a day to day basis. That responsibility falls squarely within the NGC’s corporate structure.”

Hmmm. Where have we heard such wilful ignorance before?

Of course, LifeSport!

Interestingly, according to the Express, the NGC’s corporate budget mushroomed from $67 million in 2012 to almost $200 million in 2014—around the same time that Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar shut down LifeSport and accepted Minister Anil Roberts’ resignation for his role in the debacle.

Express investigative reporter Asha Javeed might feel she is playing ‘whack-a-mole.’

While Ramnarine is in full wriggle mode, Land and Marine Resources Minister Jairam Seemungal attempted to deflect questions on SIS’ illegal occupation of 35 acres of land in Perseverance Village, Couva by trying a Jedi mind trick on another Express reporter, Juhel Browne.

According to Seemungal, the SIS has: “a lease for the agreement for part of the lands that they quoted on that particular area plus he is also paying rent on the particular piece of land.”

Photo: Land and Marine Resources Minister Jairam Seemungal (left) and an unidentified person. Mr Live Wire is reasonably certain that the person standing next to Seemungal is not named Common Sense. (Courtesy glennramhardsingh.org)
Photo: Land and Marine Resources Minister Jairam Seemungal (left) and Land Settlement Agency CEO Hazar Hosein.
(Courtesy glennramhardsingh.org)

So, by Seemungal’s thinking, if you have a deal for a certain quantity of a product then you are free to help yourself to more of the product so long as you are already paying for some or all of the product whether you are entitled to it or not.

Eh?!

With that sort of convoluted thinking, Seemungal’s wife presumably does not go through the trouble of asking him to explain his whereabouts on Friday nights a long time ago. She can feel confident that it is better not knowing.

Browne asked the Land Minister for details on the alleged rent being paid by SIS.

Seemungal retorted that, with all due respect, it was none of his goddamn business.

“Whether is State land or not, it is still private business,” said Seemungal. “When you enter in a contract with someone, you enter in a contract for everything that is in the contract is their private business, even in State land.”

Photo: Land and Marine Resources Minister Jairam Seemungal. (Courtesy 103fm.net)
Photo: Land and Marine Resources Minister Jairam Seemungal.
(Courtesy 103fm.net)

Browne might have explained to Seemungal who “State land” belongs to, what his duties are as “Government Minister” and how that might be incompatible with service as a SIS lackey.

But, frankly, that might be like trying to discuss philosophy and self-awareness with ex-Communications Minister Jamal Mohammed, financial transparency with Port of Spain Mayor Raymond Tim Kee or irony with ex-PNM Minister Ralph Maraj.

Mr Live Wire cannot confirm that SIS representatives responded to critics with: “Land ho!” and “Finders’ keepers…”

And, speaking of brazen wrongdoers, there was another appearance from the recently deposed attorney general, Anand Ramlogan, who seemed to have enjoyed a vibrant second life trolling potential witnesses against State corruption.

Photo: Rumour has it even Kermit fell victim to Anand Ramlogan's aggressive tele-marketing skills... But that is none of our business.
Photo: Rumour has it even Kermit fell victim to Anand Ramlogan’s aggressive tele-marketing skills…
But that is none of our business.

According to a letter unearthed by Express investigative reporter Denyse Renne, attorney Mark Seepersad informed DPP Roger Gaspard SC and Chief Justice Ivor Archie that Ramlogan: “telephoned me enquiring about my discovery of the document­s.”

The documents referenced by Seepersad were judicial case information that were unlawfully taken by judicial support officer (JSO) Asha Harripaul to attorney Gerard Ramdeen, Seepersad’s former business partner.

Bizarrely, the police decided that, although Harripaul and Ramdeen allegedly admitted the improper transfer of court documents, there was no need to press charges.

Presumably, the police followed the unwritten and rarely discussed bylaws: (i) if they are wearing a suit, don’t shoot (ii) if they’re with the status quo, let them go.

But what of Ramlogan?

The former Attorney General is as persistent and dubious as internet pop-ups offering improved sex lives, US green cards and lottery winnings. Ramlogan is to integrity what Tiger Woods is to fidelity. And, like late rapper Tupac Shakur, Ramlogan’s political passing has not curbed his ability to produce bonafide hits.

From henceforth, Mr Live Wire vows to use the words “Anand Ramlogan” like God intended: as a verb for shameless skulduggery in an attempt to evade justice.

Photo: Why always me?! (Courtesy HeritageRadioTT)
Photo: Why always me?!
(Courtesy HeritageRadioTT)

So, the next time your boss catches you padding travel bills, look him in the eye and say: Do dig nothing nah boss, it was just a little Anand Ramlogan I tried.

Of course, God never intended to unloose Ramlogan on anybody. And that’s probably why He does not vote or stand for the national anthem.

More from Wired868
Live Wire sheds a tear as Minister of Hypocrisy uses time-travel to join Boxing Day boat party

24 December: The Ministry of Health urges citizens to ‘keep the festivities at home this year’ and ‘celebrate responsibly within Read more

Who’s after me?! Bin Laden’s granddaughter?! Griffith fires at media while Live Wire enjoys some banter

Commissioner of Police Gary Griffith channeled his inner Mike Pence today as he repeated calls for a range of sanctions Read more

Live Wire: Griffith defends ‘pissy pooch’ after lawmen mistakenly kick in door of elderly couple

Commissioner of Police Gary Griffith is again being called to answer for the zealous behaviour of his lawmen, after officers Read more

Whodunnit?! Mr Live Wire searches for source of Express’ KPMG report on Gary Griffith

Scene: Dark, almost deserted car park in west Trinidad. Mr Live Wire makes his way towards the lone vehicle in Read more

Satirically speaking: Super-Gary-gets-appointed-Live-Wire-gets-nauseous…

Someone somewhere at sometime once said: “That’s so crazy it just might work…” The phrase caught on. But the person Read more

The Grand Bizarre Shooting; Live Wire reviews worst shooting since Raheem Sterling against Man Utd

In what may go down as the Grand Bizarre Shooting, two fully armed policemen with personal scores to settle fired Read more

Check Also

You’re mad! On Guyanese accent, rum’s reputation and ‘clinical depression’

I grew up in Guyana and the earliest memories of my childhood were that my …

43 comments

  1. We no longer have exemplars;we have examples.

  2. Today i was listening news at 12 and to hear ministers getting on like fools,I want them to now the young minds are listening to them,they should grow up the walls are falling

  3. Oh my Mrlivewire,good reading. Perhaps these politicos can be urged to compete in the ex tempo competition. They seem well suited. Ah a pun!!. I’m reminded of a pelau of Brer Anansi, Houdini,Pinocchio and Simple Simon. A composite of sleight of mouth and hand.

  4. The same thing that happened under Kevin Ramnarine’s watch, is the same thing that Anil Roberts got fired for!!!

  5. SIS is also continuing working on caroni swamp land which the EMA said they have no permission to do. Is it that they have suddenly gotten permission?

  6. Lolzzzz. I stand in my shoes and wonder…

  7. Well written as usual and funny as hell. On a side note I wonder how much the PP paying Ian Gooding. I thought he was just paid to troll Clarence Rhambarat but I see like he get a lil raise to do some overtime on wired 868.

  8. right now the propaganda they spreading is under the pnm indians never got hdc housing

  9. I joined this conversation on basis that God has not shown the stomach for intervening in local political affairs , Let me assure all on sundry and all political allied that God is fully aware and cognizances of what is take place in the political Arena !!!!1 And God ways of doing is different from us

  10. Lasana sheer genius, great stuff! You couldn’t make this up, could you? Well obviously the government is, making it up as they go along! I particularly like Seemungal’s take on transparency; if ffurther proof was needed of systemic corruption and that government is being run as though it were a private business and a shady one at that this is it, with profits being stuffed into their pockets. Government doesn’t enter into a ‘private’ tenancy agreements utilising state land! If Allen Stanford were to be released from prison today, he’d probably be given an advisory role with this administration. What nonsense am I talking bout, he’d be coming to them for advice! I wonder anyone is keeping score, tallying up? We’re talking billions of dollars here! Joke is joke but is no one going to be held to account for all of this? And what of the goat whisperer, what is happening with him? He’s ubiquitous, not like the God but a god. Is the electorate really going to give this administration the opportunity to continue to rape and pillage? Are we as a nation, as a people now totally accepting of corruption and willing to turn a blind eye as long as the price is right? Crapaud smoke we pipe!

  11. Yes, I pinched that Kermit pic from on Facebook. It’s hilarious. Lol

  12. Hilarious piece Lasana. Loved the one with Kermit but while i was cracking up i was wondering how we managed to land up with this bunch of square pegs in round holds and worse again they sound like a bunch of nincompoops. And not to mention the wily Anand. Like all his fingers and toes were in every pie and more than likely still is. Is this nightmare ever going to end? Think even God threw His hands up in the air with this bunch and decided ISIS might be a better bet. SMH!

  13. Give public assets to private interests and keep it private! That’s the flick, OK!

  14. What de hell ! I’m non partisan. I like the PM. After LifeSport I said, she loosing me. This one is the straw which breaks the Camel’s back. At some point I have to hold her responsible for the people she picked as Ministers….

  15. Liburd’s true colour revealed…and it ain’ t yellow.

    • You’re right, Ian, Lasana’s colours are not yellow. He’s transparent, like me. What are your colours, then? Because for some their true colours are not beautiful like a rainbow at all …

  16. I’m not being sarcastic at all Eric A St Bernard. Everything in quotation marks are exactly what was said by the ministers in question to the various Express reporters.

  17. “Whether is State land or not, it is still private business,” said Seemungal. – Lasana Liburd you are being sarcastic, right ?

  18. Classic!!! Talk about getting catch.

  19. lemme edit.. just in case admin pull meh up!!!

  20. This administration’s motto is “In charge does not mean responsible for.”

  21. Like it have plenty court clothes on this thread. Lol.

  22. Asha Javeed and Margaret D Renne, you all were on a roll this last week. Well done!

  23. Margaret D Renne, we’ll rename it Whack-a-crook!

  24. I’ll just leave this here to jog your memories

  25. One wonders how on God’s earth they got to where they are. Common sense is sorely lacking and any ounce of civility has long evaporated. It boggles the mind that these words just flow out of their mouths like the proverbial diarrhea, without control and not an inclination to control the stench.

  26. ok.. not to dampen the mood or be a pessimist but isn’t there blood on a fomer AG’s hand too?? He livin normal to me….

  27. Asha, Charmaine Mohammed said she wants to see all the documents you have so they could verify its authenticity…dem real good yes

  28. “Express investigative reporter Asha Javeed might feel she is playing ‘whack-a-mole.’” that game was tiring though..lol

  29. he is a fraud and a thief with blood on his hands he will pay

  30. John, I’m sure you meant bully ent?

  31. if I laughed at this… does that make me blasphemous?…. lol

  32. Ramlogan is to integrity what Tiger Woods is to fidelity.

  33. the old people use to say what in the dark will always come to light

  34. From henceforth, Mr Live Wire vows to use the words “Anand Ramlogan” like God intended: as a verb for shameless skulduggery in an attempt to evade justice.

  35. this man is the devil him self, he is a thief a racist a buller and even has blood on his hands he is a fraud

  36. Asha, that was my response too Lasana!!

  37. …. is as persistent and dubious as internet pop ups offering improved sex live, U.S. green cards and lottery winnings…” Lol lol ah weak

  38. Lasana!!! My belly is hurting from laughter!

  39. “Whether is State land or not, it is still private business,” said Seemungal. “When you enter in a contract with someone, you enter in a contract for everything that is in the contract is their private business, even in State land.” This had me smh all weekend

  40. “The former Attorney General is as persistent and dubious as internet pop-ups offering improved sex lives, US green cards and lottery winnings. Ramlogan is to integrity what Tiger Woods is to fidelity. And, like late rapper Tupac Shakur, Ramlogan’s political passing has not curbed his ability to produce bonafide hits.” You not dead but you does clearly produce a few hits yuhself.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.